Caring for a Loved One

 For a couple of months now I have been caring for the love of my life. He has been very ill, in and out of the hospital and even been intubated at on time.

I have only been able to work 2 days in more than 2 months. I have been doing all I can to care for him and even canceled and rescheduled appointments for myself.

The things we are willing to do for our loved ones are not done for recognition or praise, they are done out of love. We do them to help those we love and care for, the ones we can't imagine a day with out them in our life.

But there are those moments when we just need a break, a breath of fresh air, a minute to ourselves. But when we do this we feel guilty. At least I do, I feel like I am being selfish and I know I shouldn't.

I hate that if I take out the garbage, I feel like I am being a bad care giver. If I go to the store for more than 5 or 10 minutes, I feel like he is going to think bad of me... None of which is true.

 Even if I go take a shower, I feel like I need to wait until he is asleep, so if he needs me I am there. Then I feel like I have to hurry my shower in case he wakes and needs my help. All of these are my own thoughts and insecurities. 

He loves me and knows all I try to do for him. He knows that I love him more than anything and I make every effort to make certain he is cared for first. His well being comes before my own, and that often makes him feel bad. 

So if you ever find yourself in the situation of caring for a loved one, please, don't feel guilty about taking care of yourself. Don't feel selfish about getting some fresh air or taking a long shower. You are important too, and if you don't take care of yourself, and something happens, then you won't be able to take care of your loved one.

So with that, please love each other, and love yourself.